June 21, 2016
How Your Favorite Game of Thrones Cities Can Benefit From Inventory Management
With the sixth season of Game of Thrones wrapping up (say it isn't so!), the chess pieces are are all converging and some of our favorite characters, and the cities they live in, are about to collide in what could be a very devastating manner. Keeping track of all of the storylines over the years and the different characters is a task fit for a content management system! Speaking of that, this week's post asks the question: How would your favorite GoT cities benefit from inventory management?
King"s Landing has been the capital of the Seven Kingdoms since the show began airing (and before that, when the A Song of Ice and Fire books by George R.R. Martin started being published), and its rulers, the Lannisters, have looked to let the rest of the world know how a kingdom should be run, for better or worse. Ruling the Seven Kingdoms is no easy task, mind you, and having a giant army under your command takes a great inventory management system to make sure nothing should ever mysteriously disappear (such as a sword, let's say) and end up stabbing you right in the back!
Looking back to the days when Tyrion Lannister was the Hand of the King, the world's most famous "Imp" can be grateful that someone in the castle kept a good stock and inventory of Wildfire beneath King"s Landing; otherwise, the invading army of ships in the earlier seasons would not have been foiled so easily. Wildfire is an extremely volatile, flammable, and hazardous chemical that is pretty difficult to extinguish once combusted. Thank goodness someone in the keep"s ranks was up to date on their KOSHA standards (that's King"s Landing Occupational Safety and Health Administration) and practices for handling such material. Here's to hoping that they keep proper documentation for cleaning up and combating a fire in case that Wildfire should erupt by accident. And maybe they should have clearly marked fire exit signs as well.
Another place that could benefit from an inventory management system is House Frey, home of the not-so-loveable Lord Walder Frey. You may know him as the old man with seven wives and a hundred offspring. He may also be remembered from his role in one of the most heart-wrenching episodes of the entire show, "The Red Wedding." Violent ending aside, the wedding ceremony and afterparty were pretty well-catered, with guests coming from all over the North and the Riverlands to attend. Hosting such an occasion and making sure your room and board are fit for out-of-towners and guests means you need someone to track all of the food and wine you will be serving, take note of any rooms that require maintenance (maybe there isn't enough hay in room nine"s bed), and make sure that hallways are well-lit so no one trips and injures themselves. After all, it's a wedding, and you wouldn't want anything tragic to happen, right? It could ruin your reputation as a gracious host and wedding coordinator!
While not as fancy as King"s Landing, the High Hall of the Eyrie (watch that first step near the Moon Door; it's a doozy!), or Casterly Rock, Castle Black is perhaps one of the most important properties in all of the Game of Thrones landscape. Serving as the primary headquarters of the Night"s Watch, Castle Black has miles and miles of walls that it must protect from the Wildlings north of the Wall, not to mention that army of soon-to-be-invading White Walkers. Part of the duty of the Night"s Watch is to keep the Wall from falling into disrepair, lest some errant giant or red-bearded maniac slip through and wreak havoc in the North. It is hard labor, and while I am certain that Jon Snow was not responsible for it, someone had to use an inventory system to keep track of needed repairs and issued work orders. The same goes for the "elevator" that sends the Night"s Watch to the top of the great ice wall. Imagine if that breaks down and you get stuck at the halfway point: Better hope you brought an extra jacket.
Finally, there are all manner of objects that really need to be tracked throughout all of the kingdoms and beyond. Whether that be the all-important dragonglass (one of the few items capable of destroying White Walkers), Valyrian steel swords (also able to destroy White Walkers, but in short supply since the fall of Valyria), or one of the faces that belong to the Many-Faced God in the House of Black and White (centrally located in scenic Braavos, with tours available for a price, namely your name), or something as simple as a vial of poison, one thing is for certain: The masters of all the great houses should really get together and invent the computer. What the lords and ladies of the Seven Kingdoms really need is a good computerized maintenance management system (and some really good counseling sessions).